• About Us
    • FAQs
    • Interview with Dr. Allison Sibley
  • Specialized COVID-19 Services
  • Our Services
    • COVID-19 Offerings
    • Adult Therapy
    • Child Therapies
    • Teen Therapy
    • Couples Counseling and Therapy
    • Family Therapy
    • Group therapy for children
    • Group therapy for teens and adolescents
  • Therapists
    • Allison Sibley, PHD, LICSW, RPT-S
    • Cristina Alba, MSW, LGSW
    • Justin Barrasso, MS, LPC, NCC
    • Danielle Birx-Raybuck, LICSW, LCSW-C
    • Alexander Chan, PhD, LMFT
    • Kristin Drouin, MSW, LCSW, LICSW, APHSW-C
    • Amanda Good, MSW, LICSW, EMDR-C
    • Jules Hartsfeld, LPC, LCAS, CCTP
    • Alexis Herschthal, MSW, LICSW
    • Sarah Jones, LICSW, LCSW-C
    • Meagan Mitchell, MSW, LICSW, MEd
    • Sarah Perrin, MSW, LGSW
    • Michelle Pittman, MSW, LICSW
    • Georgette Saad, MSW, LICSW
    • Rachel Scharf, MSW, LGSW
    • Lori Seifter, Consulting Supervisor
    • Barry Shapiro, MSW, LICSW
    • Laurel Tobias, MSW, LICSW
    • Lottie Walker, MSW, LGSW, CSE
    • Rachel Yutzy, MSS, LICSW
  • Blog
  • Contact Us
    • Hours & Location
    • Payment & Forms
    • Assistant to the Director – Sherri Eichberg
  • Home
  • About Us »
    • FAQs »
    • Interview with Dr. Allison Sibley »
  • Specialized COVID-19 Services »
  • Our Services »
    • COVID-19 Offerings »
    • Adult Therapy »
    • Child Therapies »
    • Teen Therapy »
    • Couples Counseling and Therapy »
    • Family Therapy »
    • Group therapy for children »
    • Group therapy for teens and adolescents »
  • Therapists »
    • Allison Sibley, PHD, LICSW, RPT-S »
    • Cristina Alba, MSW, LGSW »
    • Justin Barrasso, MS, LPC, NCC »
    • Danielle Birx-Raybuck, LICSW, LCSW-C »
    • Alexander Chan, PhD, LMFT »
    • Kristin Drouin, MSW, LCSW, LICSW, APHSW-C »
    • Amanda Good, MSW, LICSW, EMDR-C »
    • Jules Hartsfeld, LPC, LCAS, CCTP »
    • Alexis Herschthal, MSW, LICSW »
    • Sarah Jones, LICSW, LCSW-C »
    • Meagan Mitchell, MSW, LICSW, MEd »
    • Sarah Perrin, MSW, LGSW »
    • Michelle Pittman, MSW, LICSW »
    • Georgette Saad, MSW, LICSW »
    • Rachel Scharf, MSW, LGSW »
    • Lori Seifter, Consulting Supervisor »
    • Barry Shapiro, MSW, LICSW »
    • Laurel Tobias, MSW, LICSW »
    • Lottie Walker, MSW, LGSW, CSE »
    • Rachel Yutzy, MSS, LICSW »
  • Blog »
  • Contact Us »
    • Hours & Location »
    • Payment & Forms »
    • Assistant to the Director – Sherri Eichberg »
  • Home »
 
facebook

Capitol Hill office is now open!

Schedule an appointment at info@thesibleygroupdc.com
  • Recent Posts

    • Why Validation Matters
    • You’ve heard of Post-Traumatic Stress… but what about Post-Traumatic Growth?
    • Understanding Childhood Grief in the Holidays 
    • The Parent as the Pathway to Healing
    • What is Obsessive Compulsive Disorder? 
  • Archives

    • January 2023
    • December 2022
    • November 2022
    • October 2022
    • August 2022
    • July 2022
    • June 2022
    • May 2022
    • April 2022
    • March 2022
    • February 2022
    • January 2022
    • December 2021
    • November 2021
    • October 2021
    • September 2021
    • August 2021
    • July 2021
    • May 2021
    • April 2021
    • March 2021
    • February 2021
    • January 2021
    • December 2020
    • November 2020
    • October 2020
    • September 2020
    • August 2020
    • July 2020
    • June 2020
    • May 2020
    • April 2020
    • March 2020
    • February 2020
    • January 2020
    • December 2019
    • November 2019
    • October 2019
    • September 2019
    • August 2019
    • July 2019
    • June 2019
    • May 2019
    • April 2019
    • March 2019
    • February 2019
    • January 2019
    • December 2018
    • October 2018
    • September 2018
    • August 2018
    • July 2018
    • June 2018
    • May 2018
    • April 2018
    • March 2018
    • February 2018
    • January 2018
    • December 2017
    • November 2017
    • October 2017
    • September 2017
    • August 2017
    • July 2017
    • June 2017
    • May 2017
    • April 2017
    • March 2017
    • January 2017
    • December 2016
    • November 2016
    • October 2016
    • September 2016
    • August 2016
    • July 2016
    • June 2016
    • May 2016
  • Categories

    • ADHD
    • Adult Psychotherapy
    • Anxiety
    • Bethesda Psychotherapist
    • Child Counseling
    • Child therapy
    • Coping Skills
    • Couples Therapy
    • DC Psychotherapist
    • Depression
    • Divorce
    • Family Therapy
    • Mindfulness
    • Parenting
    • Self-care
    • Uncategorized
    • Washington

Am I Doing Therapy Wrong?

Posted by Jackie Hill

“Am I doing therapy correctly?” is a question I’ve heard more than once from many of my teen and young adult clients in my psychotherapy practice in Washington, DC and nearby Bethesda, MD. My answer is that there is no “right” or “wrong” way to do therapy. Honoring your own process and journey is important.  Although your therapist may challenge you at times, they will work with you at your own pace. With experience, therapy will feel more familiar.  Even for individuals who have been in therapy before, it is normal to still feel unsure of “how to do therapy”. To be honest, the whole concept of therapy is a bit unusual- you meet a potential stranger trained as a professional listener with whom you share personal stuff without really knowing them. Of course, that’s not all there is to therapy, but when you think about relationships in general, you both usually share to get to know each other. So, feeling unsure of the therapy experience is OK, and it’s OK to tell your therapist about it. And while there is no right or wrong way to do therapy, there are some things that usually help make the experience a bit more helpful to you. 

Before giving you some tips on how to make the most out of your therapy experience, it’s important to keep in mind that the therapy experience is different for everyone and everyone has different levels of motivation, different needs and goals, as well as different levels of readiness to engage in therapy. Progress is not linear and having bumps along the road doesn’t mean progress isn’t being made (it can actually signal progress in therapy!). Even when you achieve the amount of progress or goals you wanted, it is important to still find ways to maintain that. For example, after you recover from a cold you might get a cold again, which is why it is important to still practice healthy habits like consuming Vitamin C or wearing a jacket when it’s cold outside. Mental health is similar–-you might go to therapy to find better ways to manage your stress, for instance, but after you learn how to do that it will still be important to practice what you learned.

Whether you’ve been to therapy before or are thinking of going for the first time, here are some things that may be helpful to maximize your therapy sessions:

  • Think about what you hope to get out of your therapy sessions: It’s OK if you are not 100-percent sure about what you need or want. Your therapist will work with you to figure out goals, but it does help when you reflect on what you hope to get. If someone suggested you seek therapy, think about why they encouraged you to do so.
  • Be honest: Your therapist wants to help you and being honest even when it might feel challenging can really help your therapist better understand you and what you might need. Try to be aware of your response/reactions to questions or comments, many times those can be hints to topics that are worth exploring even when you are unsure of sharing. If you find yourself saying “I don’t know/I’m not sure” frequently, challenge yourself and try and see if you can dig a little deeper within yourself.
  • Embrace your feelings: Whatever you feel during therapy, allow yourself to feel even if it might feel uncomfortable for you. Being vulnerable can be scary and that’s normal. Treat feelings with curiosity and compassion.
  • Listen to your thoughts: Thoughts can be tricky and they can sneak up on you before you know it. Therapy can be helpful to increase your awareness of that mind-heart connection and it can be quite powerful. When engaging in therapy, try to be aware of what you think throughout your days and what you experience during therapy; many times, therapy can be the pause you need in the week to be more mindful of your thoughts. 
  • Communicate: It’s OK to tell your therapist what works and doesn’t work for you. You can both brainstorm ideas that fit your needs and you are welcome to also make suggestions. If talking about some topics is difficult, it’s OK to let your therapist know. You can try to write and then read (or have the therapist read) what you wrote. If you want to include art, poetry, or music lyrics to help communicate what you need it is OK to be creative. 
  • Take care of yourself during therapy: Feeling emotionally and/or physically exhausted after therapy is quite normal and common. Depending on what you work on, it might be a good idea to have some buffer time before and/or after sessions. Therapy is hard work and having self-compassion for your journey is just as important. Honor your process and give yourself breaks as needed. For example, you can try engaging in something that is soothing for you after a session like listening to music, talking to a loved one, watching a video, writing down your thoughts/reactions after a session, or just standing and doing a couple of stretches.

Remember, it may take a while to get where you want to be, so being kind to yourself is very important. Think of a child who is learning something for the first time–do you think they will learn best if they are yelled at and scolded every time they make a mistake, or if they are treated with patience and kindness while they are explained what to do?  All things that grow require time, and so do you. So, if you (or someone you know) are thinking of going to therapy for the first time, or returning to therapy after a long hiatus, keep some of these tips in mind and think about what you would like to work on in between sessions so you have an idea of where to start for the next one. 

 

This entry was posted in Adult Psychotherapy, Bethesda Psychotherapist, Couples Therapy, DC Psychotherapist, Family Therapy, Washington and tagged prepare for therapy, Self-care, therapy tips. Bookmark the permalink.
← Previous Post Next Post →
  • About Us
  • Our Services
  • Hours & Location
  • Payment & Forms
  • Blog
  • Contact Us
  • Home
  • No Surprises Act

Allison Sibley & Associates, PLLC • 5039 Connecticut Avenue NW #5 Washington DC 20008
202-237-1196 [office]

Website by MightyLittleWebShop.com. Photos by Karen Elliott Greisdorf and Amanda Good.

©️ Copyright 2023. The Sibley Group. All rights reserved.