• About Us
    • FAQs
    • Interview with Dr. Allison Sibley
  • New! Mental Health Consultations
  • Our Services
    • New! Mental Health Consultations
    • Adult Therapy
    • Child Therapies
    • Teen Therapy
    • Couples Counseling and Therapy
    • Family Therapy
    • Group therapy for children
    • Group therapy for teens and adolescents
  • Therapists
    • Allison Sibley, PHD, LICSW, RPT-S
    • Cristina Alba, MSW, LGSW
    • Justin Barrasso, MS, LPC, NCC
    • Danielle Birx-Raybuck, LICSW, LCSW-C
    • Alexander Chan, PhD, LMFT
    • Kristin Drouin, MSW, LCSW, LICSW, APHSW-C
    • Amanda Good, MSW, LICSW, EMDR-C
    • Jules Hartsfeld, LPC, LCAS, CCTP
    • Alexis Herschthal, MSW, LICSW
    • Sarah Jones, LICSW, LCSW-C
    • Meagan Mitchell, MSW, LICSW, MEd
    • Sarah Perrin, MSW, LGSW
    • Michelle Pittman, MSW, LICSW
    • Georgette Saad, MSW, LICSW
    • Rachel Scharf, MSW, LGSW
    • Lori Seifter, Consulting Supervisor
    • Barry Shapiro, MSW, LICSW
    • Laurel Tobias, MSW, LICSW
    • Lottie Walker, MSW, LGSW, CSE
    • Rachel Yutzy, MSS, LICSW
  • Blog
  • Contact Us
    • Hours & Location
    • Payment & Forms
    • Assistant to the Director – Sherri Eichberg
  • Home
  • About Us »
    • FAQs »
    • Interview with Dr. Allison Sibley »
  • New! Mental Health Consultations »
  • Our Services »
    • New! Mental Health Consultations »
    • Adult Therapy »
    • Child Therapies »
    • Teen Therapy »
    • Couples Counseling and Therapy »
    • Family Therapy »
    • Group therapy for children »
    • Group therapy for teens and adolescents »
  • Therapists »
    • Allison Sibley, PHD, LICSW, RPT-S »
    • Cristina Alba, MSW, LGSW »
    • Justin Barrasso, MS, LPC, NCC »
    • Danielle Birx-Raybuck, LICSW, LCSW-C »
    • Alexander Chan, PhD, LMFT »
    • Kristin Drouin, MSW, LCSW, LICSW, APHSW-C »
    • Amanda Good, MSW, LICSW, EMDR-C »
    • Jules Hartsfeld, LPC, LCAS, CCTP »
    • Alexis Herschthal, MSW, LICSW »
    • Sarah Jones, LICSW, LCSW-C »
    • Meagan Mitchell, MSW, LICSW, MEd »
    • Sarah Perrin, MSW, LGSW »
    • Michelle Pittman, MSW, LICSW »
    • Georgette Saad, MSW, LICSW »
    • Rachel Scharf, MSW, LGSW »
    • Lori Seifter, Consulting Supervisor »
    • Barry Shapiro, MSW, LICSW »
    • Laurel Tobias, MSW, LICSW »
    • Lottie Walker, MSW, LGSW, CSE »
    • Rachel Yutzy, MSS, LICSW »
  • Blog »
  • Contact Us »
    • Hours & Location »
    • Payment & Forms »
    • Assistant to the Director – Sherri Eichberg »
  • Home »
 
facebook

Capitol Hill office is now open!

Schedule an appointment at intake@thesibleygroupdc.com
  • Recent Posts

    • The Truth about Therapy
    • Why Validation Matters
    • You’ve Heard of Post-Traumatic Stress… but What About Post-Traumatic Growth?
    • Understanding Childhood Grief in the Holidays 
    • The Parent as the Pathway to Healing
  • Archives

    • March 2023
    • January 2023
    • December 2022
    • November 2022
    • October 2022
    • August 2022
    • July 2022
    • June 2022
    • May 2022
    • April 2022
    • March 2022
    • February 2022
    • January 2022
    • December 2021
    • November 2021
    • October 2021
    • September 2021
    • August 2021
    • July 2021
    • May 2021
    • April 2021
    • March 2021
    • February 2021
    • January 2021
    • December 2020
    • November 2020
    • October 2020
    • September 2020
    • August 2020
    • July 2020
    • June 2020
    • May 2020
    • April 2020
    • March 2020
    • February 2020
    • January 2020
    • December 2019
    • November 2019
    • October 2019
    • September 2019
    • August 2019
    • July 2019
    • June 2019
    • May 2019
    • April 2019
    • March 2019
    • February 2019
    • January 2019
    • December 2018
    • October 2018
    • September 2018
    • August 2018
    • July 2018
    • June 2018
    • May 2018
    • April 2018
    • March 2018
    • February 2018
    • January 2018
    • December 2017
    • November 2017
    • October 2017
    • September 2017
    • August 2017
    • July 2017
    • June 2017
    • May 2017
    • April 2017
    • March 2017
    • January 2017
    • December 2016
    • November 2016
    • October 2016
    • September 2016
    • August 2016
    • July 2016
    • June 2016
    • May 2016
  • Categories

    • ADHD
    • Adult Psychotherapy
    • Anxiety
    • Bethesda Psychotherapist
    • Child Counseling
    • Child therapy
    • Coping Skills
    • Couples Therapy
    • DC Psychotherapist
    • Depression
    • Divorce
    • Family Therapy
    • Mindfulness
    • Parenting
    • Self-care
    • Uncategorized
    • Washington

How Does IFS (Internal Family Systems) Work?

Posted by Jules Hartsefeld

mini pumpkin, mug of hot beverage and two mini muffins surrounding a card that reads "MY BRAIN HAS TOO MANY TABS OPEN"

 

Do you ever feel you act differently at work versus with family? Have you ever said to yourself, “Part of me wants to do X, but another part of me wants to do Y.” The complexity of the human brain is such that we are capable of having multiple emotions, perspectives, and goals at the same time. Within our overall personality, we also have distinct sub-personalities that we shift between depending on what’s needed in the present moment.

The evidence-based psychotherapy model called Internal Family Systems (IFS) harnesses this understanding of sub-personalities, called Parts, and provides a roadmap to help people implement profound change in their lives. My clients love that IFS is gentle, non-pathologizing, and deeply impactful in helping them live more meaningful lives.

So, how does IFS work?

Think of the human brain like a cell phone. Our brains all have the same basic operating system, but each person has a plethora of unique apps (parts) to use. Each app/part is a neurobiological network in the brain that has a unique pattern of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that support our overall functioning. Each app has a useful purpose, and we consciously and unconsciously shift between them to get our needs met and cope with the challenges of life.

We can think of these apps in three categories:

Some apps carry suffering and pain from life experiences, and manifest as felt emotional pain such as fear, sadness, or anger.

Some apps try to prevent suffering and pain, usually by thinking and acting in ways to avoid, control, or preemptively distract from emotional pain. Examples can include excessive worry to prevent something bad from happening, staying quiet to avoid conflict, perfectionistic expectations to avoid possible failure, or exerting control over a partner to avoid abandonment.

Some apps react to suffering and pain, usually by attempting to extinguish the pain through extreme distraction. They take the form of compulsive action or addiction to food, sex, alcohol, shopping, pornography, video games, etc. This can also look like angry outbursts/rage or shutting down/numbing.

As a psychotherapist, most of my clients initially seek therapy because some of their apps are buggy. They find themselves having strong emotional reactions or are stuck repeating patterns of preventing or reacting to pain. IFS is a system of helping us hit the home button and get out of the apps when they take over–A way to see them from the home screen instead of being in them. This allows us to see from a perspective of compassionate self-awareness. We then work to calm the defensive apps and access and debug the apps that hold emotional pain and suffering. After that, our defensive apps won’t be as active, because there is less emotional pain to prevent and to react to in the first place. That way, all apps can work together as a unified system.

All the apps, all of our parts, have an important purpose and function, even when the outcome may be objectively unhelpful to a person’s life. Smart, competent people everywhere get stuck repeating patterns they don’t like, feel baffled as to why they can’t change, and then blame themselves. Through the lens of IFS, we can begin to understand the real purpose behind the pattern, discover what pain is being protected, and resolve the true root causes.

 

This entry was posted in Adult Psychotherapy and tagged IFS, Internal Family Systems, sub-personalities. Bookmark the permalink.
← Previous Post Next Post →
  • About Us
  • Our Services
  • Hours & Location
  • Payment & Forms
  • Blog
  • Contact Us
  • Home
  • No Surprises Act

Allison Sibley & Associates, PLLC • 5039 Connecticut Avenue NW #5 Washington DC 20008
202-237-1196 [office]

Website by MightyLittleWebShop.com. Photos by Karen Elliott Greisdorf and Amanda Good.

©️ Copyright 2023. The Sibley Group. All rights reserved.

 

favicon

New Service Offerings: Mental Health Consultations

TSG is aware of the high level of need for mental health support and treatment for the families in our community and beyond, and an increasingly short supply of available therapists. We are excited to offer new services with immediate daytime availability: Mental Health Consultations. These appointments are a one-time or brief preventive and/or supportive service for individuals and families who are not engaged in therapy at TSG, yet could benefit from consulting with a mental health expert in a variety of ways. Email intake@thesibleygroupdc.com for more information or to schedule a consultation.

Click here for more information on on our new mental health consultation service.