• About Us
    • FAQs
    • Interview with Dr. Allison Sibley
  • Specialized COVID-19 Services
  • Our Services
    • COVID-19 Offerings
    • Adult Therapy
    • Child Therapies
    • Teen Therapy
    • Couples Counseling and Therapy
    • Family Therapy
    • Group therapy for children
    • Group therapy for teens and adolescents
  • Therapists
    • Allison Sibley, PHD, LICSW, RPT-S
    • Cristina Alba, MSW, LGSW
    • Justin Barrasso, MS, LPC, NCC
    • Danielle Birx-Raybuck, LICSW, LCSW-C
    • Alexander Chan, PhD, LMFT
    • Sarah Dougans, MSW, LICSW
    • Kristin Drouin, MSW, LCSW, LICSW, APHSW-C
    • Amanda Good, MSW, LICSW, EMDR-C
    • Jules Hartsfeld, LPC, LCAS, CCTP
    • Alexis Herschthal, MSW, LICSW
    • Sarah Jones, LICSW, LCSW-C
    • Meagan Mitchell, MSW, LICSW, MEd
    • Sarah Perrin, MSW, LGSW
    • Michelle Pittman, MSW, LICSW
    • Georgette Saad, MSW, LICSW
    • Rachel Scharf, MSW, LGSW
    • Lori Seifter, Consulting Supervisor
    • Barry Shapiro, MSW, LICSW
    • Laurel Tobias, MSW, LICSW
    • Lottie Walker, MSW, LGSW, CSE
    • Rachel Yutzy, MSS, LICSW
  • Blog
  • Contact Us
    • Hours & Location
    • Payment & Forms
    • Assistant to the Director – Sherri Eichberg
  • Home
  • About Us »
    • FAQs »
    • Interview with Dr. Allison Sibley »
  • Specialized COVID-19 Services »
  • Our Services »
    • COVID-19 Offerings »
    • Adult Therapy »
    • Child Therapies »
    • Teen Therapy »
    • Couples Counseling and Therapy »
    • Family Therapy »
    • Group therapy for children »
    • Group therapy for teens and adolescents »
  • Therapists »
    • Allison Sibley, PHD, LICSW, RPT-S »
    • Cristina Alba, MSW, LGSW »
    • Justin Barrasso, MS, LPC, NCC »
    • Danielle Birx-Raybuck, LICSW, LCSW-C »
    • Alexander Chan, PhD, LMFT »
    • Sarah Dougans, MSW, LICSW »
    • Kristin Drouin, MSW, LCSW, LICSW, APHSW-C »
    • Amanda Good, MSW, LICSW, EMDR-C »
    • Jules Hartsfeld, LPC, LCAS, CCTP »
    • Alexis Herschthal, MSW, LICSW »
    • Sarah Jones, LICSW, LCSW-C »
    • Meagan Mitchell, MSW, LICSW, MEd »
    • Sarah Perrin, MSW, LGSW »
    • Michelle Pittman, MSW, LICSW »
    • Georgette Saad, MSW, LICSW »
    • Rachel Scharf, MSW, LGSW »
    • Lori Seifter, Consulting Supervisor »
    • Barry Shapiro, MSW, LICSW »
    • Laurel Tobias, MSW, LICSW »
    • Lottie Walker, MSW, LGSW, CSE »
    • Rachel Yutzy, MSS, LICSW »
  • Blog »
  • Contact Us »
    • Hours & Location »
    • Payment & Forms »
    • Assistant to the Director – Sherri Eichberg »
  • Home »
 
facebook

Capitol Hill office is now open!

Schedule an appointment at info@thesibleygroupdc.com
  • Recent Posts

    • You’ve heard of Post-Traumatic Stress… but what about Post-Traumatic Growth?
    • Understanding Childhood Grief in the Holidays 
    • The Parent as the Pathway to Healing
    • What is Obsessive Compulsive Disorder? 
    • Who is your “Best Self” and How can that Help You?
  • Archives

    • January 2023
    • December 2022
    • November 2022
    • October 2022
    • August 2022
    • July 2022
    • June 2022
    • May 2022
    • April 2022
    • March 2022
    • February 2022
    • January 2022
    • December 2021
    • November 2021
    • October 2021
    • September 2021
    • August 2021
    • July 2021
    • May 2021
    • April 2021
    • March 2021
    • February 2021
    • January 2021
    • December 2020
    • November 2020
    • October 2020
    • September 2020
    • August 2020
    • July 2020
    • June 2020
    • May 2020
    • April 2020
    • March 2020
    • February 2020
    • January 2020
    • December 2019
    • November 2019
    • October 2019
    • September 2019
    • August 2019
    • July 2019
    • June 2019
    • May 2019
    • April 2019
    • March 2019
    • February 2019
    • January 2019
    • December 2018
    • October 2018
    • September 2018
    • August 2018
    • July 2018
    • June 2018
    • May 2018
    • April 2018
    • March 2018
    • February 2018
    • January 2018
    • December 2017
    • November 2017
    • October 2017
    • September 2017
    • August 2017
    • July 2017
    • June 2017
    • May 2017
    • April 2017
    • March 2017
    • January 2017
    • December 2016
    • November 2016
    • October 2016
    • September 2016
    • August 2016
    • July 2016
    • June 2016
    • May 2016
  • Categories

    • ADHD
    • Adult Psychotherapy
    • Anxiety
    • Bethesda Psychotherapist
    • Child Counseling
    • Child therapy
    • Coping Skills
    • Couples Therapy
    • DC Psychotherapist
    • Depression
    • Divorce
    • Family Therapy
    • Mindfulness
    • Parenting
    • Self-care
    • Uncategorized
    • Washington

Three Quick Tips to Enhance Your Self Worth

Posted by Kendra Handy

 

Here are three quick things you can do in the midst of your busy daily life to find a quick boost to your self worth:

  1. There is no quick fix, and anyone who tells you there is, is trying to sell you something.
  2. There is no quick fix, and anyone who tells you there is, is trying to sell you something.
  3. There is no quick fix, and anyone who tells you there is, is trying to sell you something.

 

I am very sorry.  But, alas, in all the years I’ve been a therapist (in all the years I’ve been a human being, really), I have found exactly no quick solutions to working towards enhanced self worth.  

 

Isn’t this the worst?  I really consider this one of the top three most unfair things about life.  Why can I not just get another promotion and then I feel better about who I am?  What if I lose five more pounds – what about then? Maybe if I become an expert in just one more thing?  If I add another 500 square feet to my house? I add a few more credentials at the end of my name? I get just one more A in another class?  I get my kids into just the right colleges? What if I set the table perfectly? Or I meditate just one more time?  

 

Unfortunately, no.  None of that will help in any lasting way.  Again I say: this is one of the most unfair things about life.  

 

As my favorite writer Anne Lamott puts it, “it’s an inside job.”  

 

As a therapist in the Washington, DC metropolitan area, I work with many people who describe themselves as “perfectionists” and yet, each of them has a different idea of what they need to do in order to reach this ever-moving target of perfection.  (By definition, if “perfection” doesn’t exist by one agreed-upon definition, it does not exist at all, right?) We are constantly working towards this illusion, shaming ourselves for falling short of something that wasn’t there to begin with.  And perfectionism runs rampant in DC, with everyone operating under the belief that we have to be “ahead” of others; it gives us the false sense that if we are perfect enough, we “win.”

 

I think the reason perfectionism is so seductive is that it constantly leaves us feeling like we are just one step away from being okay.  (Another favorite writer of mine, Liz Gilbert, says perfectionism is just fear in high heels. This makes perfect sense to me. We are all terrified, and we are all terrified to admit that we are terrified.)  So perfectionism feels like a way out – we are just one step away from not having to feel afraid anymore. We’ve made it. We’ve got enough letters after our name now to tell that voice in our head to leave us alone – the voice that’s been following us around since we were in the 7th grade and someone said something awful to us.  We’ll show them! And then we get those extra credentials after our names, the ones we thought would totally legitimize us and keep us safe from ever experiencing Imposter Syndrome ever again, and… ugh.  Didn’t work. So again, we are left considering what else we have to do to achieve perfection. Maybe next time. 

 

As Will Ferrell puts it so simply, and yet so accurately: “You are never not afraid.”  

 

So, I have no perfect answers for how to work towards enhanced self worth because it is so deeply personal that one blog post cannot possibly give you any answers to your most profound questions.  You’ve got to stop looking here. Or looking anywhere outside yourself. Again, it’s an inside job. The best place to start is perhaps to consider that you are not one step away. You’re, perhaps… already there.  With all the abilities and qualities you’ve ever needed to feel self-worth.

This entry was posted in Adult Psychotherapy, Coping Skills, DC Psychotherapist, Mindfulness, Self-care. Bookmark the permalink.
← Previous Post Next Post →
  • About Us
  • Our Services
  • Hours & Location
  • Payment & Forms
  • Blog
  • Contact Us
  • Home
  • No Surprises Act

Allison Sibley & Associates, PLLC • 5039 Connecticut Avenue NW #5 Washington DC 20008
202-237-1196 [office]

Website by MightyLittleWebShop.com. Photos by Karen Elliott Greisdorf and Amanda Good.

©️ Copyright 2023. The Sibley Group. All rights reserved.